WHAT ARE THE MISTAKES PEOPLE MAKE IN THEIR 20's THAT WILL GUARANTEE THEY WILL HAVE A HARD LIFE IN THE FUTURE.?

It’s not partying/drugs. Bill Clinton, Obama, Richard Branson, and Steve Jobs did that.

It’s not trouble with the law. Mark Wahlberg, Tim Allen, and Dog the Bounty Hunter had that.

It’s not getting into a relationship too early. At 24 Tony Robbins got married to an older woman with 3 children and raised them for the next 14 years before divorcing.

Drugs, jail, and bad early relationships may make it more likely to have a hard life, but they don’t guarantee it. Here are a few things that do.

Believing life ends when you turn 30. For some reason, this trap springs on intelligent and unintelligent, rich and poor alike. 30 seems “old”, and old people don’t have wants, desires, needs and aspirations. Then one day you turn 30, and it hits you. You feel like you are more “you” than you were in your 20’s. You’re more creative, more focused, more emotionally intelligent than before. And until now, you haven’t given a lick of thought to what a fuller version of you would want and need for a fulfilling, happy, sustainable life.
Not finding your “thing” and committing to it. Some people find their thing early and don’t commit to it, like Colonel Sanders who was an amazing chef as a boy, but didn’t circle back around until he founded KFC in his 50’s. Other people commit to something that’s not their thing, like the depressed doctor who realizes they only went to med school for their parents, not because it was what they wanted to do. You’ve gotta have both. Some people, like Steve Jobs, are lucky and find their thing + success before their brain finishes developing. Others, like the Beatles, put in 7 years of practice before their big break. It may not even look like a thing that exists yet: you could just be working on it in your head like Einstein, who worked on his theory for 14 years. (You might feel too fickle — but even that can be a thing: be a journalist, or something else with lots of variety.) Whatever it is though, intentionally choose it, and commit to it.


Not expanding your horizons. If your life is perfect, that means you’ve got everything you need right in front of you. If it’s not, that means the answers are out in the world somewhere. Everyone knows that travel expands your horizons. But so do books. So do new social situations. So does learning new skills. Spend a lot of time doing at least one of those so that you can find the gold nuggets that will make your life better in the future.
Not understanding yourself. Not everybody knows themselves, but people that have a handle on life sure do understand themselves. It’s just like anything else. You don’t know how an iPhone works, but you understand how to use it. So you don’t need deep introspection, or personality type tests, etc (unless that stuff works for you). But you do need to know your patterns, your tendencies, what motivates you and what drains you — enough to be able to say “this is right for me, this isn’t right for me”.


Not picking a life anchor. You need something that when the storms of life come (and they will), gives you peace, clarity, and purpose. I am a Christian, so my faith is my anchor. Stephen Covey writes about the most popular anchors people choose (principles, family, money, and ). Without an anchor, I guarantee you life will be hard.


If you eliminated the word "but" from your professional vocabulary. People would have a very different perception of you.

The reason, is because the word "but" negates everything that precedes it, and you cast a negative spin on anything you say when you use it.

Consider, for example, "We can do it this way, but it'll be way too expensive given our budget," versus "We can do it this way, and if we do, we'll need to cut back on other important features." The first indicates that we can't even consider the option. The second acknowledges possibility and describes consequences.

"But" is exclusive and isolating, "and" is inclusive and welcoming.


Show me someone that believes life ends when they turn 30 and I’ll show you someone who is in for a rude and hard and unprepared awakening. Show me someone who doesn’t find and commit to something, and I’ll show you someone who is miserable and finds it hard to make a life. Show me someone who doesn’t expand their horizons, and I’ll show you someone who gets stuck in the same negative cycles with no idea about how to get out. Show me someone who doesn’t understand themselves and I’ll show someone who wouldn’t know a good life for them if it bit them in the butt. Show me someone without an anchor, and I’ll show you someone who has it all together until a tragedy happens, and then their whole life breaks down.

A hard life after 30 isn’t hard because of the things you chose to do in your 20’s, but because of the things you didn’t choose to do in your 20’s. If you don’t want to have a hard life in the future, it really boils down to this: choose yourself. Both now, and for the future.